Friday, October 06, 2006

oh how i wish.....

so i have a delema... I want my life to be perfect but it can't be. I want to have enough time in the day to be able to get up, spend time with my Lord and savior, workout, take a shower andget ready for my day. then Gabriel would wake up, we would eat breakfast and then do what we normally do in the morning. (play) then we would have lunch, followed by a nice long nap (which he actually does take...3 hours to be exact so i can't complain about that one). duringthe nap i would have time to do any household chores as well as be able to work on whatever project i am currently working on. then once he woke up he would play by himself while i made a wonderfully delicious dinner for the family. my husband would come home to a nice home cooked meal everyday, and i stress everyday! then we would get gabriel ready for bed and have a nice evening to ourselves. now not all of what i have just written is pure fiction or unatainableso let me point out fact from fiction.
FACT:i do try to be diligent about getting up before gabriel to spend time with God.
when gabriel gets up we do have breakfast together and then play time. after lunch he does take a nice 3 hour nap. i do get some chores done during that time.
occasionally i'll get to work on something fun. to often i sit in front of the tv watching dr phil, lol, how lame is that! we do have a regular bed time routine that gets gabriel to bed by 7-7:30 pm which means that we do get to have a relaxing quiet evening together.
FICTION: working out every morning (try not at all). getting ready for the day before gabriel wakes up(i'm lucky if i get ready for the day before my husband comes home). time to get bothchores and fun stuff done in the afternoon(rare indeed! but oh how i wish!). and then the big parts, having time and skill to make a delicious hot meal for my husband to come home to.ha! that will be the day! i can't say that i'm a good cook,(sadly) but i would love to have more time to learn. and lastly that my husband would come home EVERYDAY! oh what i would give for that to be the case! saddly military life rarely allows such regularity in schedule. :( and since my hubby wants to make it a career i guess i'd better get used to it huh?
so, that is my wishful thinking, not to mention that i would have enough money to be able to go buy a magazine or some mascara without regreting my "splurging" purchase. i know that there will come a day, but today is not it. we do ok but life as a low nobody navy sailor with a wife and a baby is finacially rough. like i said, someday, and in the mean time my wonderfulhusband's love and provision is all i need. as long as we are fed and loved we will continue to thrive. for these earthly things have no true value anyway, they are merely things that willrot and turn to dust one day. so may i be truly thankful for the bounty of blessings that wedo have! and may i not covet what others have that i don't. because let me tell you, as i look around online i find so many blogs and websites with amazingly talented women who are into
the same things that i am. but here is the one huge difference...20 years of age! almost all of them are in there 40s, they are becomeing moms of teenagers or empty nesters. i however am a 21 year old mom with a 1 1/2 year old son living in Sad Diego on the salery of a low ranking sailor. i know my day will come. :) in the mean time i will just look on and drule and dream of the things that i might one day be able to do or have....